Was it Love?

I’m a romantic. Hopeless romantic. Also, I still don’t know if it was love or just attachment or maybe infatuation.

So many days have gone by and I still think about you. It’s funny how someone can become your everything in such short time. Short time. Oh wait, that doesn’t sound right!?  Was it love? Was it attachment? Was he the love of my life or was he my obsession?Was it my loneliness or my need to feel special?

This is my second post on the series, ‘How the year 2016 changed me’ – an attempt to understand my feelings.

If anyone can answer –

‘why we fall in love?’

Or 

‘how to fall in love?’

They’ll be billionaires (not kidding! Their YouTube channel will be a go to destination for all & their books will be bestsellers!) and also, they’ll be LYING. No you can’t PREDICT love. It’s a beautiful mysterious thing.

We all get attached to people every now and then. Right? Atleast I do. We want to talk to them, tell them our stories, spend time with them. We love their attention & we Miss them when they aren’t around.

Familiar enough? 

But is this attachment is what we call ‘love?’

Maybe. Maybe not.

They say, ‘love at first sight!’ isn’t love. I agree. That’s  pure attraction. But the catch is, LOVE & ATTRACTION go hand in hand. 

Love is weird. Every one is different and so is their idea of love. But I swear these romantic Bollywood movies have hyped love so much.

I think it’s a mix of attraction and conversation. You wanna kiss them so bad and at the same time the idea of just sitting in a park looking at the stars and the ability to talk about anything & everything is equally appealing.

Love is comfort.

Love is happiness.

Love is your support, your backbone.

Love is your strength.

But what if your love is ‘one sided?’

I can’t just smile and accept my ‘unrequited love!’ They don’t love you? Maybe it’s gonna hurt right now but you can’t make someone fall for you. Just move on. Clinging on to something that doesn’t belong to you, is never a good thing.

You can’t keep that love in your heart always and no you shouldn’t hurt others because you were hurt & needed a Rebound. I’ve been there. But then I realized –

Love doesn’t hurt, obsession does.

If you still want closure to move on, because It’s. Driving. You. Crazy. Honey, that wasn’t love. Learn to ignore. 

We think so much before investing our money (also before uploading a picture on Facebook/instagram), so WHY can’t we think so much when choosing a right partner?

Don’t settle because you were scared of being alone. I almost dated this guy because wow he was too kind. He complimented me. Pampered me. He was right for me, I was right for him but as the great Robin Scherbatsky has said, ‘timing’s a bitch!’ I had to let go. One bad decision to hang on to my so called ‘attachment’ ruined what I could have had with him. But I wasn’t in love with him. I was in love with the way he made me feel. 

Attachment is your need, you need the attention and feel good about yourself. But love my dear, it’s beyond that. Attachment will go away with time, love will always stay. In one form or another, but it will. Love is unreasonable but attachment isn’t. 

Difference between love & attachment –

If ending the relationship makes you hate your partner, it was love. But If it just makes you anxious, or makes you think, ‘I have to make them love me!’ that’s attachment. Love is passionate, attachment is just a manifestation of your ego. Love is painful but attachment is painful only when you don’t get time from them.

Don’t spoil your time because you couldn’t let go. Don’t confuse infatuation with love. 

And you know what? It’s okay to be single. You’ll find the ‘one’ eventually. Till then, drink a little. Dance a little. Maybe some healthy flirting. And don’t ignore the power of good food & a bit of  workout (stay in shape, will you? Fit to fat is just one vowel away!)
BOOM. MIC DROP.