Ego


Before I start, here’s a question for you guys – “How the year 2016 changed you?”

Change is inevitable, & so is personal growth. Looking back at 2016 I can think of so many incidents that shook me & I’m not talking about Brexit or Trump’s win for that matter.

I’ve decided to document these changes on this 7 part series called ~ ‘How 2016 changed me‘ & here is the first part – EGO.

You don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

“You’re such a condescending jerk!!!!”

“You’re so full of yourself!”

“Why can’t you call first?”

“You really need to stop showing off!”

“It’s just a grammar mistake on a casual chat, please stop being a grammar nazi all the time.”

“Yeah yeah, you’re a Mr. KNOW IT ALL.”

“Will you stop fishing for compliments?”

“I know you have connections with powerful people because you mention that to me thrice a day. Stop!”

“You’re so materialistic!”

“Is it so important to have the Last word in an argument?”

If you’ve heard any of these sentences for yourself before, darling you’re suffering from ‘Ego-mania.’


So what exactly does Ego mean?

 Ego is nothing but an image you’ve created for yourself that gives you an identity or should i say, Ego is an exaggeration of who you are. It’s the feeling of self importance that blinds you to the truth. Ego is your over confidence, Ego is what gives you a superiority complex. 


Ego is ‘self image’ gone on the rampage.

We all have Ego, some have big Egos & others have realistic ones. A big ego is nothing but high self esteem & sometimes, it’s not a bad thing but most of the time, it is. 

For example – When Muhammad Ali, a man who proclaimed himself “The Greatest,” you appreciate it and you certainly don’t call him overconfident for saying “I’m the best!!” because he has proven his mettle. That’s his swag. That’s his charm. That’s his big ego but it’s this ego ṭhat tells him, “You are unstoppable!” & he believes it. The truth is, it’s not just his big ego that made him great, it was his practice that did. But again, you can’t ignore the much needed motivation that his big ego gave him.

If some mediocre boxer announces that, ‘I’m the best!’ And lose his next fight, will you still appreciate it? No. You’ll laugh at him. 

There, that’s the difference.


One thing I’m glad that changed in 2016 is my EGO.

The trouble with big ego is, there’s a constant need of approval from others that you’re the best. You want to be appreciated. You think you deserve it, because come on, “you’re the best.” Things should go exactly how you want them to be.

You need all the attention in the world to feed your ego. Sometimes you’ll get it, sometimes you won’t. Trouble starts, when you are so immersed in this emptiness that you start lying around to make yourself sound important. You’ll belittle others just to prove you’re better than them. You become the drug sniffing dog of finding faults in others just to satisfy your need to be feel superior.


Ego is like that corrupt politician who makes false promises of making everything better & before you know it, Ego starts controlling your actions & all of them will be to gratify only yourself.

Ego is not ambition, ego is ‘over ambition.’ It’s an illusion. It’s a shadow you live behind to protect yourself from your own mediocrity. It is the root cause of ignorance.

“The ego is a terrible taskmaster who drives you to distress.”

(The Tao is Tao, 73)

It will be wrong to say that I’m not egoistic anymore. I don’t think that’s a state even possible to achieve. But yes, I’m not ‘that’ egoistic as how I used to be & that’s a progress I’m really proud of.

I’m not saying I don’t care about the compliments I get, I’m saying I don’t fish for compliments. I’m not saying I don’t like 300 likes on my pictures, I’m saying I don’t care even if it’s just 10. I’m not saying I’ll sell my iPhone because I’m not materialistic anymore, I’m saying I’m not gonna show off my iPhone. I’m not saying I’m satisfied with my life, I’m saying I’ve accepted the emptiness. I’m not saying that I won’t argue with you if I think you’re wrong, I’m saying I won’t hesitate accepting my mistakes. 


The hardest lesson you will ever learn is to accept the fact that you aren’t that important as you think you are, or that they won’t love you back just because you’re in love with them


It’s heartbreaking. If you have big ego, this is gonna shred you to pieces but if you are mature enough to understand that not everything is meant to make you happy, you might find happiness in letting go. 

Everything that happens in your life, is not happening TO you, it’s happening FOR you. You don’t have to like it, but life will be happier if you do.

Even the word says, let it (e)GO.



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103 Comments Add yours

  1. Coyote from Orion says:

    Well said

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Coyote from Orion says:

    Interesting year. Still a bit to go. Best of luck 😆

    Liked by 1 person

  3. teddyleting says:

    Now, this is a perfect explanation of my essay. Great one

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Need that badly 😂 thanks again 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You liked it? Yay!!

    Like

  6. Hey, good one. It was a good read. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m glad you liked it 😄 thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Coyote from Orion says:

    Can definitely relate. 2016 has been a year that I have done a bit on less. The excess really got shaved off and I came out well on core structure and principles. Definitely owe my successes to a lot more than just myself

    Liked by 1 person

  9. aruneshgupta says:

    Well written and thorough research. Needs to be more concise next time
    👍

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Well stated and great read! Egos can be the hardest to overcome!

    Liked by 2 people

  11. ajaykohli says:

    Ego is not wrong if its monitored

    Like

  12. I’ve mentioned that 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  13. That’s kind of you 💕 thank you so much!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. True that! Hope 2017 will have the very best in store for you!!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Coyote from Orion says:

    You too 😊

    Like

  16. That was such a nice post!

    Like

  17. colinandray says:

    A wonderful piece of writing, and about such an important aspect of human development. May I suggest that you do a follow-up Post on self-esteem?

    Liked by 2 people

  18. That is in pipeline sir 😄 although it’s not exactly on just self esteem, it’s about vanity & self esteem. Hope you’ll like that too 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  19. colinandray says:

    I shall look forward to it. As an aside – I really do not need the “sir” as a form of address. Colin is quite acceptable… being my name! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  20. That works for me. Hi Colin, Reva this side 😄

    Liked by 1 person

  21. colinandray says:

    Hi Reva. That is much nicer! Have a wonderful day… and get working on that Post! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Next is something else actually! I’m writing a 7 part series on how 2016 changed me. .its a part of that. I’m writing on ‘love and attachment’ right now, any inputs are more than welcomed 💕

    Liked by 2 people

  23. colinandray says:

    Perhaps a piece on “reality checks”? Those things that just happen and make you step back and review your life and/or your future. Perhaps a piece on negative incidents and how they were changed to positives? What you have learned from life and how it has changed your perspectives? How a significant emotional event dramatically changed your reality? What you have learned from your parents and others of that generation…. what is applicable and what is not? How world events impacted your life? Are you in tune with your culture, or is there a desire to change it? Depending your age – How have your life perspectives changed from teen to adult?
    Just some random thoughts! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  24. colinandray says:

    Whoa indeed! Life can be so educational if viewed constructively can’t it! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  25. Certainly if is! I’ve so much to say but I’m caught up in something. I’m gonna get back to that comment of yours in a while 😄

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Rob says:

    A fantastic morsel of literary delight

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Keith says:

    It is not ironic that you selected ego as the first piece. Living in America, we just elected as President one of the most narcissistic people many of us well ever witness. I am still stunned that people could not see through this man and his insatiable ego. His history has shown, it has always been and forever will be about him.

    So, in terms of change for me, I did my best to advocate against this man, so I will need to learn to live with him as our President and all that entails. I will need to pushback on the issues that mean most to me, should they not be addressed or he leads us down a poor path and I hope he will be successful doing more good things for our country.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. Gracias ❤️ this is the most beautiful compliment I got today ☺️

    Liked by 2 people

  29. Rob says:

    Well you deserved it. It was terrific!

    Liked by 1 person

  30. To be honest, I sincerely didn’t expect him to win but then I guess we all didn’t imagine the silent support he had behind him. Had it been Sanders instead of Clinton, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have won. He fought against the administration and I guess people really needed a change. It was disappointing seeing him winning this especially because he never disclosed HOW HE WILL MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN. No plans, nothing. But since now he is the president elect, you should accept him wholeheartedly. If Pence can, so can you! Stay United and do your bit. America is great because of its residents and not its president 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  31. I’m still smiling. I’m sincerely hoping you’ll like the rest of the articles in this series too 💕

    Liked by 2 people

  32. Rob says:

    If this one is any indication I certainly will

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Its basically about what this year taught me. Really appreciate your comments 🤗 happy blogging 😄

    Liked by 2 people

  34. Rob says:

    Why can’t I click the follow button?

    Liked by 1 person

  35. I’ve no idea 👀

    Liked by 1 person

  36. colinandray says:

    Hi Rob – “Follow” works for me (from Laptop). Any chance its an iPad/iPod thing?

    Like

  37. Rob says:

    Days unable to follow

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Rob says:

    Oops working now

    Liked by 1 person

  39. Haha Finally! Yay!

    Liked by 1 person

  40. Coyote from Orion says:

    As I began… perfectly said. Have a great day

    Liked by 1 person

  41. You’re too kind! I’m from India & it’s midnight here 😁 have a great weekend 😄

    Liked by 1 person

  42. This was a hardcore awesome post! A lot of fun ideas written very clearly. It sounds like your ego has softened even if it is still large. The willingness and open-mindedness you developed to admit when you are wrong is a huge step in humility. I know when I was younger I always had to get the last word, and that was ego.

    You are one of the first people I’ve encountered to claim having a big ego can actually be tough on self-esteem. They are so hard to differentiate but I think self esteem is more your self value without comparison to others.

    I wanted to learn how to kill my ego for a long time but I decided that ego is how you relate to other people and is a needed psychological tool for relationships.

    Liked by 1 person

  43. First of all, thank you! You got my point and I’m so glad we are connected here. Ego, as you said is the urge to have the last word & ‘self esteem’ is to know when to stop before it’s too late. Ego can often disguise as self esteem or you can it is inflated self esteem. Speaking psychologically, Freud gave the concept of id, ego & superego. You might like reading about it ☺️

    Liked by 1 person

  44. I have read a fair amount of Freud. I accidentally ripped him off in my prior post regarding the super ego. If you read that thing I am sorry haha.

    People give Freud a lot of criticism because he wanted to have sex with his mom but he was onto something regarding the unconscious. Your unconscious is like your own personal shoulder Dionysus. I think a lot of identity information about the ego is formed in the unconscious. There was a shift in collective unconscious to idiosyncratic unconscious in the 1880’s. This is when “hysteria” started because identity roles in society got so complex and the unconscious couldn’t consolidate.

    Anyway ya Freuds cool thinking historically, but I been more into Eckert Tolle type stuff recently. Any reading suggestions?

    Liked by 1 person

  45. Eckhart Tolle is class apart. Totally unrelated but read ‘daring greatly.’ You’ll like it. For Authors like him, I’ll suggest Deepak Chopra 😃

    Liked by 1 person

  46. S&KLife says:

    That was beautiful *tear* ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  47. Coyote from Orion says:

    Timothy Leary’s 8 system model. Antero Alli does a good version called Angeltech

    Like

  48. Coyote from Orion says:

    Jung on the shadow… and Memories, Dreams, and Reflections

    Liked by 1 person

  49. Its beautiful the way you described the word EGO..
    Nice literary skills you have.. 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  50. I just cried 😬 haha thank you so much ☺️ happy blogging ❣️

    Like

  51. Carl Jung is without a doubt the most prominent psychiatrist!! 💕

    Like

  52. Thank you!!!!! Happy blogging ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  53. Coyote from Orion says:

    Dr Timothy Leary. Professor of Psychology at Berkeley

    Liked by 1 person

  54. I’ll read him now! Thank you for the suggestion 💛

    Like

  55. Soul catcher says:

    I enjoyed reading it. Well researched👍

    Liked by 1 person

  56. Yay! Thank you 😁

    Liked by 1 person

  57. Soul catcher says:

    You’re welcome😀

    Liked by 1 person

  58. sudershana says:

    Wonderful words you have stated. Thanks for sharing it!

    Liked by 1 person

  59. Thank you for this ❤️ happy blogging 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  60. requeterebe says:

    never thought of ego that way, you totally change my point of view, I am getting very interested on the subject thanks 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  61. Yay! Next post will be up tomorrow! Please check 😁

    Like

  62. requeterebe says:

    I will 😀 have a nice day!

    Liked by 1 person

  63. novelistbaba says:

    great post…….ego has sunk many ships………..better leave it in a corner somewhere….. 🙂 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  64. Thank you so much & couldn’t agree more! Happy blogging 💕

    Like

  65. eatyourego says:

    Much needed food for thought. Happy to see another soul reaching beyond the confines of self 🙂

    Like

  66. Wow!!! I love this post!! Thank you so much!!!! 😀 XD

    Like

  67. any1mark66 says:

    Interesting thoughts. The true problem that plagues us we tend to believe our own thoughts rather than others first

    Like

  68. This is a very good post here! Ego is something that we all have and display to some degree. The challenge with our egos is learning to control it at times. How you break down ego is refreshing and makes a person realize that it is not always about them.

    Liked by 1 person

  69. This made me smile! I couldn’t agree more. Thats a challenge & a pretty big one too, but the results are overwhelming! Happy to connect ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  70. This was well written! Our ego sometimes destroys things, but sometimes we need a bit of ego as well!

    Liked by 1 person

  71. Yes! Thank you ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  72. poetrylover says:

    Interesting post- loved the last line.

    Liked by 1 person

  73. Yay! Thank you 🦋

    Liked by 1 person

  74. Okoto Enigma says:

    I don’t really think having an ego is a bad thing; most people never had it; so technically having an ego is kind of like growing out of your comfort zone. Most people just see it as something bad; whereas its not.

    Liked by 1 person

  75. I know. I’ve mentioned that in the article. Ego isn’t bad till it clouds your judgement 😄

    Liked by 1 person

  76. Okoto Enigma says:

    Hehehe sometimes it’s good when it does that😅 it’s basically our mind speaking

    Liked by 1 person

  77. Umm, let’s leave it at agree to disagree 😂 it’s not our mind when we think we are the best when we are not. It’s good if that gives you the confidence to be the best, it’s not when you become bombastic.

    Liked by 1 person

  78. Okoto Enigma says:

    I agree with you👌

    Liked by 1 person

  79. I think the psych def of ego is inadequate. For Freud the ego is simply the personality .Of course it would be the goal of therapy to manage and explore neuroses. Naturally does not mean the same as arrogance as in the first definition. Thanks for your recent visit to my blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  80. Freudian theory is a bit different. It has 3 parts, id, ego & super ego. I tried not involving that part but I did mention ego isn’t bad! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  81. Yes, right. So much that is new and perhaps contradictory to Freud has evolved over the decades but I think he should be the be the beginning point for psych studies. Same with Darwin. So much new and different now in evolution but both are like learning the multiplication tables for us to enter into their respective fields.

    Like

  82. Soul Gifts says:

    Ego is a tricky little devil. nips you in the butt when you least expect it 🙂
    Appreciate your follow – wish you well in 2017 and hope that you have a peaceful and love-filled Christmas

    Liked by 1 person

  83. have a look at one of my similar posts that i wrote 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  84. I think the ego which gives us pride also breaks us into pieces. When we break that’s when we learn that we had ego and a big one. Been there, experienced it 😅

    Liked by 1 person

  85. We all have been there at some point of time I guess 🙂

    Like

  86. Yeah, but the pain varies according to ego. Good post, but must have written about transcending our mind and emotions and to remain in present moment (if you have read power of now) it would help a lot of people who are in this Paradox.

    Like

  87. Yeah, but pain varies in everyone. Good post, but you must have written about how to remove this it would have helped a lot many.

    Like

  88. Thank you so much! Happy blogging 💞

    Liked by 1 person

  89. thanks for showing us how to have a new conversation with ourselves

    Liked by 1 person

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